Wow.  I can’t believe how people never fail to make me feel good about myself.

“Mother coached children to fake retardation
POSTED: 1246 GMT (2046 HKT), February 27, 2007

TACOMA, Washington (AP) — A woman admitted Monday that she coached her two children to fake retardation starting when they were 4 and 8 years old so she could collect Social Security benefits on their behalf…”

– CNN.com International Edition

Really?  No kidding.

I have two kids.  I have enough trouble keeping them from acting like they are retarded.  This woman coached them to act retarded.    But she got paid for it, she got paid over $222000.  There  is not enough incentive to keep your kids from acting like they are retarded these days.

An underlying issue is the overzealous use of the word retard by CNN.  I counted five on the page.  Not very PC.  

To add to the pile of retarditude, not only did this woman and her kids rip off legitimately retarded retards, but I am sure there is some sort of copyright infringement for totally stealing the premise for “The Ringer”…or the other way around.

I smell sequel.

—

In other news:

“Five years’ jail for compulsive liar who posed as forensic expert

Karen McVeigh
Friday February 23, 2007
The Guardian

A conman who built his career posing as a forensic expert to dupe victims out of thousands of pounds was jailed for five years yesterday, as police began the task of re-investigating 700 cases in which he was involved.

Gene Morrison, 48, of Hyde, Cheshire, bluffed and lied his way through hundreds of trials, for almost three decades, fooling judges, barristers, solicitors and their clients into believing he was qualified.

He left school with no qualifications but gave evidence in cases involving armed robbery, rape, death by dangerous driving, unexplained death, drugs offences and questioned paternity…”

-Guardian Unlimited Network

Also arrested…television shows CSI Miami, CSI New York, and CSI Las Vegas, after it was found the CSI teams were  in fact, actors.

“We lied to you.” 

– Lt Horatio Caine – IN FACT actor David Caruso commenting on CSI: Miami’s five seasons of  LIES

 Be careful out there people, you don’t know if that forensic investigating retard is legit or not.